He got out of the car and there was nothin' wrong with him, don't you hate that? So I ran his ass over. And some jerk pulled up in a brand new Mercedes and pulled right into the handicap spot. Walter: My wife and I couldn't find any place to park anywhere near this stinkin' joint. 'Dearly beloved, we are gathered here todayĆ-' 'I'm not dead yet! Let me out of here! You son-of-a.' ![]() Peanut: I think it'd be cool to be a ventriloquist. Walter: I'd come back as my wife and leave me the hell alone. Jeff Dunham: Well if reincarnation happens, who would you come back as and what would you do? Jeff Dunham: Wal-mart, huh? What would be your opening line? Walter: I want to be a greeter at Wal-mart. 'It was three minutes ago!', 'Who are you?!?'. Walter: Their 80s? The hell kind of sex is that? 'Was it good for you?' 'I don't remember'. ![]() Jeff Dunham: I had grandparents that were well into their 80s and still were having fun. ![]() Slow to respond and not a lot of satisfying results. You know, maybe she should call you FEMA. Exciting at first, then it ends in disaster. Jeff Dunham: Sometimes calls me the 'the Hurricane'.
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